Developing the Leader Within You


Chapter 1

The Definition of Leadership: Influence

“Everything rises and falls on leadership.”


What top three qualities/character traits do you look for in a leader that you are willing to follow?

Name a leader from history and a living leader you respect and
tell why.

Where is your influence greatest, at home, church or work? Briefly describe why. Name the “level” of your influence in each of these three environments.

Chapter 2

The Key To Leadership: Priorities

“The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook.”

William James

What are the three most productive priorities you do (or need to do) in the context of your workplace? Grade yourself A–F on each one.

What are the three most productive priorities you do (or need to do) in the context of your family? Grade yourself A–F on each one.

List two-to-three things that you need to eliminate from your schedule, your life, or your responsibilities. (Don’t even think about saying you can’t eliminate anything!)

Chapter 3

The Most Important Ingredient Of Leadership: Integrity

“People with integrity have nothing to hide and nothing to fear.”


What is your definition of integrity?

Where are you tempted to violate personal integrity?

How do you continually develop your own personal integrity as
a leader?

Chapter 4

The Ultimate Test Of Leadership: Creating Positive Change

“Change is not an option.”

How have you changed…recently? Be specific.

In what area are you most likely to resist change? Explain.

What change do you need to implement at work or at home? What is the first step you need to take?

Chapter 5

The Quickest Way To Gain Leadership: Problem Solving

“Leaders solve problems.”

List the positive aspects of a problem.

What current problem are you facing? What progress have you made?

How can leaders develop the art (intuition) of recognizing a problem before it’s a “problem” — or at least before it’s a crisis?

Chapter 6

The Extra Plus In Leadership: Attitude

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny
matters compared to what lies within us.”

Walt Emerson

Would your family and co-workers generally describe you as having a positive attitude even when the pressure is on? Comment.

What kinds of things are likely to sour your attitude?

What kinds of things can you do to sweeten your attitude?

Chapter 7

Developing Your Most Appreciable Asset: People

“The most important single ingredient to the formula of success is knowing how to get along with people.”

Teddy Roosevelt

In your opinion, what are the top three keys to getting along
with people?

What motivates you? (Circle letter of each choice)

a. Challengef. Purpose (vision)

b. Role modelg. God’s love

c. Not failingh. Public Commitment

d. Dissatisfactioni. Accomplishment

e. Previous successj. Someone believing in you

How can you improve your skills in the art of confrontation?
Be specific.

Ask your wife and your boss if they perceive you to be an encourager and someone who brings out the best in people.
Jot down their answers.

Chapter 8

The Indispensable Quality Of Leadership: Vision

“Some men see things as they are and say, ‘Why?’
I dream of things that never were and say ‘Why not?’”

George Bernard Shaw

How does a leader arrive at a “vision”?

Look at the list of 10 vision hinderers. Which two are the most difficult for you to deal with and why?

Which is more compelling, the vision of the church or the vision at your company/organization? Describe why.

Chapter 9

The Price Tag Of Leadership: Self-Discipline

“It is easier to suppress the first desire than to satisfy all that follow it.”

Ben Franklin

How well have you mastered the principle of pay now, play later? Describe.

In what areas do you struggle with self-discipline?

In what areas is your self-discipline strong?

Chapter 10

The Most Important Lesson Of Leadership: Staff Development

“It marks a big step in your development when you come to realize that other people can help you do a better job than you could do alone.”

Andrew Carnegie

Name one or two people you really depend on where you work. Describe why. (How they help you, and how you invest in them.)

Of the Seven Deadly Sins, which are not a problem for you? Where do you need improvement?

If you suddenly took over your bosses position, what would you
do differently?

The Five Levels of Leadership


Leadership is influence.

Level 1Position

_______________ — People follow you because they have to.

Your influence will not extend beyond the lines of your job description. The longer you stay here, the higher the turnover and the lower the morale.

Level 2Permission

_______________ — People follow you because they want to.

People will follow you beyond your stated authority. This level allows work to be fun. Caution: Staying too long at this level without rising to the third level will cause highly motivated people to become restless.

Level 3Production

_______________ — People follow you because of what you have done for the organization.

This is where success is first realized by most people. Those who follow you like you and what you are doing. A leader at this level makes things happen. And most problems are solved through the benefit of positive momentum.

Level 4People Development

_______________ — People follow you because of what you have done for them.

This is where sustained growth occurs. Your ability and commitment to developing leaders will ensure ongoing growth to the organization and the people. The people are bigger, better and stronger because of your investment in their life.

Level 5Personhood

_______________ — People follow you because of who you are and what you represent.

This step is reserved for leaders who have spent years growing people and organizations. Few make it. Those who grow to this level have extraordinary impact.


1.As you grow to a new level, you cannot _______________ the principles of the preceding levels.

2.You can be at different levels with different people, but overall, you are primarily at one level.

3.Moving to the next level isn’t automatic, (a function of putting in your time,) it takes _______________ effort.

4.When you change organizations you are not guaranteed in the new organization the same level you had where you were.

5.There is a _______________ of growth within each level, and the higher you grow, the greater the range.

6.The higher you go the more personal sacrifice is required.

7.A leader _______________ stops growing.

Key Questions:

1.What level of leadership are you on with most people?

2.Do you sense your influence increasing or decreasing?
(with those above and below you)

3.Are you willing to pay the price to grow as a leader?

Growing As A Leader

(Moving Up The Five Levels)


I. Moving from Non-Leader to Leader Level 1 —

The Bible teaches us in I Timothy 3:1 that leadership is a worthy aspiration. The scripture also goes on to immediately list the high character standards for those who accept this responsibility. Our motives are quickly checked as we see God’s expectations of a spiritual leader. So you want to be a leader…good. But first reflect on why and what you believe God wants you to do.

A.Examine your motives

1.Why do you want to be a spiritual leader?

2.Are you willing to pay the price?

The following is a common list of price-tags that leaders will pay when serving God and people:

a. pressure

b. criticism

c. loneliness

d. long hours

e. difficult decisions

f. personal sacrifice

g. commitment to growth

3.What do you hope the rewards will be?

B.Clearly identify your strengths and weaknesses.

What are your productive strengths and what are your destructive weaknesses?

C.Name three people who you think are great leaders. Make a list of their qualities and learn from them.

D.Know your job and do it well.

E.Take initiative to do more than is expected and accept responsibility.

II. Moving from Level 1— Position Leadership to Level 2 — PERMISSION LEADERSHIP

A.Pray every day for God’s heart for people.

It isn’t enough to say “I like people,” even if you mean it. You must have God’s heart. You will “see” life differently when you look through God’s eyes. This is truly a life-changing prayer.

B.Listen more than you talk and learn to ask excellent questions.

We communicate how much we care by how much we listen and how much we are on the other person’s agenda compared to on our own agenda. Leaders who are good with people make it a practice to ask good questions in order to learn more about the person so they can better serve them. The questions are often very simple, but the answers reveal much when you listen carefully between the lines. The point is not to ask questions just to ask questions, but always ask with a specific purpose in mind. For example:

1.How is your family doing?

2.(Ask about his or her background.) Tell me your “story.”

3.Are you enjoying your work this week?

4.What is the toughest thing you are dealing with right now?

5.What is the best thing you have recently learned?

6.How are you growing in your Christian faith?

7.Are you feeling close or distant from God these days?

C.Practice the three steps to relational charisma.

All growing leaders, at one time or another, surrender to their own perceived or real, lack of charisma. Charisma is unfortunately characterized by that mystical almost magic-like personality that only a few are given by God. The truth of the matter is that, yes, only a few are given those extraordinary gifts of charisma, but everyone can develop the basics of charisma on an interpersonal level. The following steps to charisma (on an interpersonal level, not necessarily on a public platform) are more than achievable even by average leaders. The good news is that as these are developed and practiced with consistency, excellence, and intention, the leader won’t stay average for long.


Be more interested in making people feel good about themselves, than making people feel good about you.

In other words, when you walk into a room, whether there are two people or two hundred people there, your focus is not worrying about what they think of you, but your only interest is helping the people feel good about themselves. By sincere compliments, authentic encouragement, careful listening, and brief nuggets to help them grow you will find people “lining up” to be near you.

Obviously, that is not the goal. But the role of a leader is to influence as many people as possible according to the gifts that God has given him or her. This will unquestionably help maximize your potential. This is difficult for insecure people because they can’t move past what other’s think of them. But for the leader who finds his or her security in Christ, this is a pure joy.

2.Learn people’s names quickly.

3.Smile and live enthusiastically (with passion), and stay positive!

4.Learn to see life through other’s eyes. (perspective)

5.Help those around you become more successful.

D.Commit yourself to being an encourager.

A “multitude of leadership sins” can be corrected by simply being an encourager, as long as you commit yourself to encouraging specifically and sincerely.

E.Avoid the three top relationship killers:

1.A controlling nature

There is a great deal of difference between being a leader who is in control and being a controlling leader. The former exercises control for the benefit of the people and carries the authority as a responsibility, not an entitlement to lord over others. The controlling person controls for the wrong motives, often out of insecurity, or sometimes simply out of selfishness to get his or her own way.

2.A critical nature

People run from critical people, and it’s very difficult to lead from behind! As noted earlier, encouragement is essential to leading people. The opposite of encouraging is criticism. It only takes one criticism, even a well-intended criticism, to undue about ten praises or encouragements.


A crabby nature

When people can’t trust the consistency of your attitude or mood, they simply cannot trust you. And if they cannot trust you, then they cannot follow you. You know how you feel about moody, crabby, cranky people; leaders are held to even higher standards.

F.Learn to quickly and easily say “I’m sorry.”

Learning to accept responsibility for mistakes and to acknowledge them is a foundational people skill for every leader. Whether you blew a project, or hurt someone’s feelings, speak up and say “I’m sorry,” “I did that,” “I messed that up,” or “I hurt you.” “Will you forgive me?” People will respect you much more in the long run.

G.Seek to understand rather than to win.

No one ever wins an argument. Arguments result in a “lose-lose” scenario. That is why the “win-win” principle is so important. A leader must spend less time being defensive and trying to prove a point, and more time seeking to understand the others’ point of view.

H.Quickly share credit and praise.

It’s amazing how much we can accomplish when it doesn’t matter who gets the recognition. Share both publicly and privately, both in written form and verbally.

III. Moving from Level Two — Permission Leadership to

It is very important not to skip Level Two (permission) and jump to Level Three (production).

The temptation is greatest for talented people with a significant amounts of drive as well as under pressure to “make things happen” in short amounts of time.

For a short time, a talented leader who can get the job done but has poor relationships will be tolerated, and perhaps even praised for the productivity. But sooner or later the lack of people skills which will result in poor relationships will catch up with him or her. Unresolved conflict that results in a big problem that is nearly impossible to resolve because so much “bad blood” has gone under the bridge. Even if a major people conflict never arose, which is highly unlikely, there comes a time in every person’s life, a season if you will, in which productivity decreases. Perhaps a personal issue, perhaps fatigue — but whatever the case, without solid relationships to fall back on, the leader is set for a major fall. So be productive but never neglect those relationships.

A.Develop a personal life mission statement.

B.Learn when to say no and when to say yes.

C.Possess a firm grasp of the 80/20 principle.

20 percent of the effort produces 80 percent of the results when priorities are right.

D.Possess a firm grasp of a problem solving model.

E.Learn from your mistakes.

F.Pay now and play later.

Cultivate a willingness to do what is necessary before that which is enjoyed. Too often leaders are sidetracked by that which they enjoy doing rather than tending to that which they are responsible to accomplish.

G.Pay attention to and understand the nuances of timing.

H.Develop accountability for results — begin with yourself.

I.Cultivate a tenacious, near ruthlessness for doing what produces results and nothing else.

IV. Moving from Level 3 — Production Leadership to

This begins to tap into the heart of leadership. The earlier levels are more apprenticeship levels because until you begin to reproduce yourself you have not yet fully realized the essence of leadership. This is also where the greatest joy and rewards of a leader are experienced. There is nothing quite like seeing someone’s life change for the better because of your love, care, guidance, challenge and influence.

A.Seek out a special time of prayer over you for empowerment by an anointed leader who has great credibility with people.

This is not as mystical as it perhaps sounds, but nonetheless very important. There is a certain element missing in all of us that prevents a maximum lasting impact on people. Perhaps it is our sin nature or just individual human shortcomings. In any case, the power of the Holy Spirit on a leader’s life is necessary to move successfully into this level of leadership. It is also necessary to stay and grow at this level. A leader certainly can pray for him or herself for this blessing, but Christian history teaches us that there is something special about the empowering prayer of an anointed leader.

B.Interview three spiritual leaders who have proven credibility, integrity and influence. Ask them:

1.What is the most significant leadership lesson you have ever learned?

2.Why do people follow you?

3.What is the key to developing people?

C.Spend a day alone with God and review your motives, integrity level, and personal walk with God.

Clear a day and take nothing but a Bible and a note pad. Spend the day in meditation upon God, and reflection on yourself. Invest long periods of prayer seeking God’s face about the condition of your heart and respond by journaling God’s answers and your insights. The goal is to do a “gut check” and refocus yourself as a servant leader. God cannot bless you long term as a people developer if your personal agenda comes before the people you are pouring yourself into.

D.Make sure that your “house” is in order before attempting to reproduce yourself into other people. Do whatever it takes to make and keep your marriage and family strong.

I Timothy 3:12 reminds us that if we cannot manage our own house well, then we have no business assuming the spiritual responsibility for other people. This does not mean that leaders must be perfect, we are all sinners saved by grace, but it does mean that leaders live by a higher standard than others. And this higher standard requires our homes to be loving, nurturing environments that glorify God and set a good example for others to follow. If a leader influences thousands, but loses his family, he has lost it all.

E.Develop around you a team of prayer partners.

F.Gather a core team around you and invest yourself in them. Teach them leadership!!

G.Invest more time leading, planning, thinking, praying, dreaming, developing, and less time doing.

This is the place in leadership when your “to do” list becomes shorter but your responsibilities become greater. This is the principle of leadership inversion where you are “doing” less, but accomplishing more. This is true leadership…influence. It is obvious that at this level, a leader’s future potential is determined by the people he brings around him.

H.Dedicate yourself to living a life worthy of others following — model well.

I.Encourage often and empower freely.

V. Moving from Level 4 — People Development Leadership to Level 5 — PERSONHOOD LEADERSHIP

This level cannot be sought, earned, or received simply by outlasting everyone else! It comes ultimately from the sovereign hand of God. God’s hand is revealed in the form of talents, abilities, natural energy levels, opportunity, relationships, and timing. As these merge with God’s kingdom plan, certain leaders are raised up to a level that is beyond themselves.

It is wise however, to make ourselves available to God should He have big plans! In other words, do not think this level impossible, just impossible by your own human means.

One other note on this level, I believe it is entirely possible for you to reach this level with your own family. The important issue is to never stop growing in your leadership development. Do everything possible to grow in your influence, and let God take care of the rest.

Characteristics at this level:

1.Followers are sacrificial and loyal.

2.Level five leaders have mentored and empowered many effective leaders.

3.Public authority is granted to others by level five leaders.

4.Success of new leaders is measured against the success of level five leaders.

5.Leadership is destiny for level five leaders.